The Game Is Rigged

“The game is rigged in your favor.  The universe is on your side.  Just do it!” ~ Me to myself 

I lean from the balcony
The spotlight burns cold darkness.
Dazzling blind agony
Illuminates my starkness.
Black and white, my doubt extreme
The spotlight burns cold darkness.
Holding in my panicked scream.
Will you catch me as I fall?
Black and white, my doubt extreme
Disconsolate voice in thrall.

Where is the faith I long for?
Will you catch me as I fall?

The drop composing song for
the trust my lonely heart lacks.
Where is the faith I long for?
To simply allow, relax
I lean from the balcony
the trust my lonely heart lacks
I lean from the balcony.

Inspired by: Balcony and #OctPoWriMo Day 16: Catch Me When I Fall, written in  the form of a terzanelle.

Following Clues

I am learning to honor the inklings,

discern the distant echo of a bell ringing,

feel into this ghostly ancestral triggering.

There are others with me

who share the discomfort of this attentive

focus on our wounds:

the bitter tears unshed,

the trauma calcified inside walls

we constructed so long ago

that we forgot them.

As we learn to trust

our listening hearts

hone to

the tiniest signs:

like the flutter of a bird’s wings on the periphery,

a shadow cast by its quick journey,

easily missed

easily dismissed,

observed with doubt until

painfully claimed

with one firm hammer strike

breaking open

bringing to the light

what was hidden behind closed doors.

Inspired by The Daily Word Prompt: inkling